Hands-On Assists: Correction or Connection?

There's some debate about the purpose and usefulness of hands-on assists during a yoga class. I'm going to set aside the factors such as making the entire class hold a pose so that one person can get an assist, for example, to touch on one thing: for what purpose are we offering the assist?

I think there are a lot of yoga teachers who would say they offer assists in order to keep their clients "safe." This is a noble cause, but it's difficult to know exactly how every person will feel in a given shape. How does the teacher know that what a client is doing is "unsafe?" What even is unsafe? Sure, if a person is about to topple over into someone else, or is in imminent danger of falling on their neck that seems pretty cut and dried. Other than that? Knee past the ankle in a Warrior? Not unsafe. Drooping the heart towards to floor in Triangle? Not unsafe. Can't see their toes in Chair? Not unsafe. You might be getting the picture.

Every person has their own body proportions, which means that every person is going to look different in a given pose. Rightly so! It's not easy, to the point of absurdity, to try to force everyone to look the same. I'll often say that I hope nobody looks like me in their pose because they're NOT me. They're THEM. What a terribly boring world we'd live in if everyone looked the same and functioned the same. We can and should celebrate our differences both on and off the mat!

Other teachers will say that they are trying to help a client to go "deeper" into their pose. Again, since we can't know how anyone feels in a shape, we can't know if they're at a point where the pose is most nourishing for them--even if they could potentially go "deeper." (The idea of depth of pose brings up another topic: hierarchy of poses. There isn't one, but it's sometimes implied by the teacher. But that's for another day.) In my thinking, if I put my hands on a person to get them deeper into a pose, is that new, deeper pose something that I gave them or something that is theirs by rights? If a person can't find their way to that depth, it isn't theirs. And the practice isn't about me, the teacher. It's about a client choosing for themselves the best shape for their situation today. I can guide and offer suggestions, but the final exploration is--or should be--theirs alone.

Some clients may feel like they're being corrected rather than assisted when offered hands-on adjustments. Even the languaging we use--assist or adjust--implies that the client is either unable to get into a pose or that it is somehow in need of tweaking. When a yoga teacher prowls the room and does put their hands on people, it can easily lead to a client's feeling like they have been doing it "wrong," even though that may be far from our intention. While we know that impact is more important than intention, we teachers sometimes forget the impact in favor of the intention. The power imbalance of the teacher-client relationship will prevent some clients from pushing back on touch that they are not comfortable with (the teacher presumably "knows better") which adds a layer of difficulty to the interaction.

Finally we get to the idea of connection. Sometimes a teacher wants to connect with a client in a more visceral way though touch. I get that and love to connect with clients too, but would argue that there are other and better ways to do that which don't begin to imply any of the things that I've already mentioned. If physical touch is necessary, a hand on the shoulder, or fist bump is a good way to start. Maybe you'll get to know your clients well enough for hugs to be welcome (and some clients have grown into great friends along the way.) But getting to know each person a little bit at a time allows a natural connection to develop without any whiff of correction. Changing our language can help us along the way too. I try to say something like "do you need a hand?" I still have yet to find language that I'm perfectly comfortable with but, as with so many things, it's a process for sure.

Listen, I'm not telling any teacher what they should or shouldn't do in their classes with their clients. I'm mostly hoping to elucidate a position that's a bit different from what we often hear in our initial 200 hour trainings. More information, and a different perspective, can allow us to serve our clients best, and clear their paths towards a nourishing, fulfilling practice of their own.

A woman receiving a hands-on adjustment in Janu Sirsasana A